Posts tagged ‘Grief’

June 28, 2015

New Every Mourning…

God’s mercies are new every morning. And with the dawn, wise men have said that Joy comes.

I have often found this to be true.

Today, as I sat quietly, welcoming the first light of the day, a new perspective came into view. You see, some sunrises don’t hold smiles or giggles. Instead they bring a batch of fresh tears… hot and erupting.

Grief will surprise us with it’s presence from time to time.

It’s been 6 months since my big brother took his last breath on Christmas morning last year. When waves of grief come, it is not a debilitating, soul-crushing experience anymore… not like it was in the beginning. The emotion comes to the surface, spills out and somehow leaves me a little lighter. A little stronger, even. This is new. And in my heart I accept this as part of the journey.

God’s mercies are new every mourning.

Somewhere in the midst of this grieving process, a shift has come. Now, when sorrow passes over me like a cloud, I realize it is only to bring a shower of remembrance and a reminder of never ending connection. For me and those who are growing in understanding of bereavement, there is precious hope.

We still love.

We are still loved.

And that love lives on forever.

Lord, thank you for new mercies that are lavished upon us… especially on the mornings that we are greeted with fresh grief. May we feel the consequences of opening our hearts and lives to deep, deep love. May we look to you for comfort and enlightenment when relationship shifts from the physical form we understand most. Let us never become reluctant to feel our way through the full experience. We choose to let love overwhelm our heart, overflow from our eyes and run down our cheeks… knowing that this, too, is a part of living a gorgeous life. 

Thank you, for the dawn of a new day and the new mercies that are revealed in the mourning.

With gratitude and peace in knowing,

Tracye

March 3, 2013

Grief Song

Sitting in blankets, wrapped tightly… being held.
Praying. Conversating… with Comfort.
His Voice, so tender, in whispers my heart desperately needs.
 
This moment and the ones to come, call for the warmth of a cup of tea
and so I peel off my layers and mingle water with flames.
 
The sounds of her sadness touch my heart and my knowing leads me to follow the pattern of short breaths down the hall to her tears.
A deep exhale. Pause. Staccato inhalations. Repeat.
 
Grief like a song…
 
All I can do is hold her. Just be there. Right there… in the newness of this.
New, like freshly upturned Earth. Cool, moist and ready for planting…
Fertile.
 
White tissue held to eyes now made pools of mourning…
I hold on
We sway… just a little.
The rhythm continues.
Short, short long
Pause
 
Memories as words tumble out here and there
Her life
It’s meaning
The legacy
The Love
 
Ahhh the Love
 
And then the wail of the teapot I forgot
 
Right on cue… from the Greatest Conductor
 
It’s crescendo sang out… filling the house with the cry of my own heart, a sound of surrender from the depths of my soul.
 
The release…
Fire turned down
Heart turned up
 
We will allow ourselves to dance to this
Short, short long
Surrendered souls swaying
to this Grief Song